Part 1: Bridget - The Unplanned Journey

G-Rex [00:00:00]:
3 3. 21. Welcome back to another episode of shit that goes on in our heads. Today, we have a really awesome guest. Her name is Bridget. She has an amazing story to tell. And welcome, Bridget.

Dirty Skittles [00:00:32]:
Welcome, Bridget.

Bridget [00:00:34]:
Thank you very much. I'm really glad to be here.

Dirty Skittles [00:00:36]:
How was your day?

Bridget [00:00:38]:
Well, it was it was one of those days where I had to do, you know, a bunch of errands. It's my day off. I'm off on Thursdays Fridays, and Seems like I always have a 1000000 things to you know, errands to run. So I had 2 doctor's appointments. I, I did some cooking. Oh. I took a nap. It's been a good day.

G-Rex [00:00:59]:
Did you

Dirty Skittles [00:01:00]:
make anything yummy and tasty you wanna share?

Bridget [00:01:02]:
Well, you know, I I like to I I liked, TikTok. Okay? So I I had to get off of all the political stuff. So now I'm on recipes and comedians and, art. So I I found this recipe on TikTok, and it just looked so easy and so simple. And I did it, and it tastes great, but it Turned instead of soup, it turned into a really thick soup. Like a gravy. Yeah. Bigger than that.

Bridget [00:01:35]:
But, anyway, it it's okay. I wouldn't serve it to guests, but I ate it.

Dirty Skittles [00:01:41]:
Can we can I share what my for you page is on TikTok?

Bridget [00:01:46]:
Oh, what? See if you

Dirty Skittles [00:01:47]:
see if I get a laugh. It is Men chopping wood.

Bridget [00:01:52]:
Oh, so you know Thorne

Dirty Skittles [00:01:54]:
Yes. Thorne Bradley. Shout out. Thorne.

G-Rex [00:01:56]:
Yes.

Bridget [00:01:57]:
Yeah.

Dirty Skittles [00:01:57]:
Come on to our podcast.

Bridget [00:01:58]:
Yes. I know that guy too.

Dirty Skittles [00:02:00]:
And and it is this man who makes delicious, meals, But I don't know what his name is. He does, like, a lot of desserts and, like, you know, aggressive whipping of, like, creams. Oh. And then it's, it's usually spicy audiobooks. So

G-Rex [00:02:20]:
Oh. Just so Yeah.

Dirty Skittles [00:02:21]:
We all know where we stand on TikTok.

Bridget [00:02:23]:
I'm I'm telling you. What about you,

Dirty Skittles [00:02:26]:
Grapes? You wanna share?

G-Rex [00:02:28]:
Nope. No. Because I can't say TikTok, I say Tic Tac. Remember?

Dirty Skittles [00:02:35]:
Tic Tac. I know.

Bridget [00:02:37]:
Tic Tac.

G-Rex [00:02:39]:
Because I'm old.

Bridget [00:02:40]:
Ticky Tacky.

G-Rex [00:02:41]:
Ticky Tacky. Ticky Tacky.

Bridget [00:02:44]:
TikTok. TikTok.

G-Rex [00:02:45]:
Hey. During schedules, I bet if you watched, Ticky Tacky Last night, you could've figured out what we were supposed to do with your pasta sauce. And so

Dirty Skittles [00:02:54]:
what? Listen. Now I have to tell the story. So, you know, sometimes you have, like, a really busy day, and you don't have all the time in the world to make, like, a Fresh home cooked meal. Mhmm. So I had this freezer meal that would that is pasta, It's like a bolognese sauce. Right? And so I I pull out the packet from the freezer, and I'm reading the back. And I read it at least Ten times. And my brain, it should probably be studied.

Dirty Skittles [00:03:25]:
You know what I mean? Like, it needs it needs its own class, but I can be very, very literal. And so I'm reading the package, and it tells me to boil 4 quarts of water. And I'm like, that is a lot of fucking water for, like, Serving size of 2. Right? I'm like, okay. Oh, yes. You know? Or whatever. Pull out the big pot. Boil the 4 carts of water.

Dirty Skittles [00:03:47]:
The next step is take the sauce and put it in the water for 2 minutes. I'm like, that's so fucking weird because it's like a small sauce packet. And I read it and read it and read it, and I'm like, alright. Maybe it's like a sauce concentrate and there's 4 quarts of fucking water. Cut it open, squeeze it into the water, and immediately, I knew this ain't right. You know? Like, I have done something very wrong. The oil is on the top. I was like, this this ain't it.

Dirty Skittles [00:04:19]:
But I proceed because I'm following the fucking steps. Put in the pasta. Boil the pasta for 4 minutes. Drain the pasta. And I'm looking at it. I'm like, there is no fucking sauce. And then it dawns on me oh, I think they meant, like, take the sauce packet and put the packet in the water for 2 minutes and then take that out. So you know what? It wasn't on me.

Dirty Skittles [00:04:42]:
That was poor directions. So I had to just pull out pasta sauce and put it on the pasta, and it was fine. My son loved it, had seconds, then wanted it for lunch. So

G-Rex [00:04:53]:
Hey. I have tears in my eyes. I'm sorry. Because you're such a good, like, fuck it. Excuses. Bucket's

Bridget [00:05:08]:
done. Yeah. When I was a kid, my dad used to make spaghetti for us. And if we didn't have sauce, that was fine. He just called it naked spaghetti. We used to love naked spaghetti. We'd ask for that. I love that.

Bridget [00:05:20]:
Did we eat naked spaghetti tonight?

Dirty Skittles [00:05:23]:
I love that. I know that so much. Naked spaghetti.

G-Rex [00:05:29]:
Yum. Did you put, like, butter on it, naked spaghetti?

Bridget [00:05:32]:
Butter and Parmesan cheese.

G-Rex [00:05:34]:
Hell, yeah. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. Naked spaghetti.

Dirty Skittles [00:05:38]:
That's one of nuggets' favorites.

G-Rex [00:05:41]:
Love naked spaghetti. Alright. And I think I want some nuggets. Forget it. Some fuck that. Love you. Love you, but

Dirty Skittles [00:05:51]:
Nugget spaghetti is something different. Oh, not naked spaghetti.

G-Rex [00:05:58]:
Alright.

Dirty Skittles [00:05:59]:
Mind in the gutter. Okay.

G-Rex [00:06:02]:
Oh, gotcha.

Dirty Skittles [00:06:04]:
What are we gonna talk about today?

Bridget [00:06:08]:
I don't know. I I you know, I guess we're gonna talk about, This recent diagnosis that I've gotten and the struggles that I've had with it, it's so new. And, I guess, talk about my struggles and and how I cope with that on a daily basis. I mean, there was probably gonna be some other stuff that pops in. So I think about the stage of life that I'm in and How I've been making plans and how this has just thrown a big old wrench into, my plans.

Dirty Skittles [00:06:53]:
And so for those that are listening, what is the recent diagnosis you've received?

Bridget [00:06:58]:
Recently diagnosed with Parkinson's disease.

Dirty Skittles [00:07:03]:
And how has that impacted your life?

G-Rex [00:07:09]:
Well,

Bridget [00:07:14]:
Right. You know, you go through the stages of grief. Right? And so I'm I'm right now fluctuating between grief and anger. I haven't gotten even close to the acceptance part. I I don't even know what the 5 stages are. I know that the first 2 are the 2 that I'm working on real hard. Yeah. So the immediate, you know, the immediate, thing that I started to do is educating myself.

Bridget [00:07:49]:
You know, I had to. I had to, you know, I'm a learner. I'm a lifelong learner and I had to learn everything that I Could find out about this because if I understood it, it would be easier to manage because, you know, I I wanna Control and manage this and make sure everything's okay. That doesn't work in this particular situation either. So, so I did that. I'm still doing that. I do that on a daily basis. I learn something new every day.

Bridget [00:08:24]:
I have decided to, cut back on working hours. And, I I had intended to retire anyway in 2024, August. And, but since the diagnosis, I have found myself so scattered, So fearful. So angry. Working. It's not like my job is real stressful. I love my job. But it was just the expectation that I had to be on.

Bridget [00:08:59]:
I had to be working at a certain time. Had to be on the computer. I had to be, available. And so just the knowing that I had to do that would cause me stress. And the stress, as we all know in many times, no matter what kind of issues you have, stress can cause you problems or anything. And so I found that that aggravated my symptoms quite a bit, the, The tremors, which is was the first symptom. This this is the symptom that took me to the doctor in the 1st place. So I've cut back my hours to 20, and it has helped.

Bridget [00:09:40]:
I have mixed feelings about that too because While I I say I want to take more time for self care, At the same time, if I do work, I I take my mind off the The the Parkinson's or

Dirty Skittles [00:10:02]:
It's a distraction.

Bridget [00:10:03]:
It's a definite distraction. And like I said, I love my job, and it's a great distraction. So I balance I'm I'm I'm really kind of on the fence there. I've I've made a decision that February 1st, I'm gonna be retiree officially. And I'm pretty sure I'm a stick with that. But It it seems like I have a different outlook on life almost every week. Sometimes it's every day I look at the world a little differently. And for somebody who's I hate to say controlling, but Controlling! Like, I've got You know, this is the plan and this is gonna how it's working out and blah blah blah blah blah.

Bridget [00:10:49]:
And for for someone like me to To be in this, I don't even know how to describe it. Just Uncertainty? Uncertainty. Just,

G-Rex [00:11:06]:
confusion,

Bridget [00:11:12]:
Fear.

G-Rex [00:11:13]:
Do you feel like you're a little pissed off at the world right now?

Bridget [00:11:17]:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This is not what this is not what, I had planned, for my The rest of my life, you know, I had this so rosy plan. You know, I moved into this, 55 plus neighborhood, 5 years ago. It'd be 5 years in January. And part of the reason I did that is I'm single. I live alone.

Bridget [00:11:41]:
I have a tendency to isolate. I was living in this big house, more more space than I needed as a single person, and sitting up there on the hill and didn't talk to anybody. Didn't know any of my neighbors. The 1 neighbor I did know Was nice enough, but she too talked too much for So I would hide. When I went outside, I would kinda hide. If I saw her out there, I wouldn't go out. So so that's The person I am. I I just wanna isolate me by myself.

Bridget [00:12:11]:
And, I have this wonderful family. And my brother-in-law kept telling me, you know, you you you need to do something different. That's that's not a good place for you to be. And he talked me into taking a look at some of these 55 plus communities and it just so happened there was one right near me where I lived And I decided to take the jump. I I wasn't sure I could afford it. I mean, this place is like living on a resort. But I took the the leap of faith and turned out it's it's the best choice I ever made for me. And I'm constantly around people if I want to be.

Bridget [00:12:54]:
If I don't wanna be, I close my door and don't answer it. There's activities here. The women that I've met in this neighborhood, single women, very much like me, some a little older. We just hold each other up take care of each other. Just I I don't know what I would do without these women here, and I think I got off track here. But what was I saying? I don't even know what I was talking about.

Dirty Skittles [00:13:25]:
No. You didn't get off track. I mean No. You're working through it.

Bridget [00:13:30]:
Yeah. So I I'm I'm grateful I have these people here. And that's the other thing. This this neighborhood is gonna be great for me. Oh, that was my plan, my retirement plan. Right? I have all these things to do here. I'm never gonna be bored. I'm not gonna be alone if I don't want to be.

Bridget [00:13:47]:
I feel safe in my neighborhood. I have no family here in Nashville, but I feel I still feel like this is home to me. So that was it. I was gonna retire In in August, and I was gonna get more involved in the activities. I was gonna find something that I could, do volunteer work and Because I love to paint, and I'm I I just wanted more time to do that. So that was the plan. And then got all the money, You know lined up as the best I could you know This is what it's gonna do. I'm gonna do I'm just gonna make it happen and you know how we get scared of that anyway We get scared of that retirement

Dirty Skittles [00:14:39]:
What am

Bridget [00:14:39]:
I gonna do? I got social security right well for now So I, you know, just kind of had the old plan down and and, I just When that when that doctor actually, the way that it really happened was about 7 years ago, I had this tremor, and I didn't even notice it. Other noticed it, told me to go to see this doctor. So I go see the doctor. He said, Yeah, I see it. I think it's probably, essential tremor. And it's a common thing that people, as they get older, have this tremor. It's benign. It doesn't, it's not A big deal.

Bridget [00:15:25]:
Some people have it really bad, and there's treatments for that. But he said, that's about all that's what it is. So I just Accepted that and went all about my business. And then last fall, about this time last fall, maybe even before that, I was at the pool. It had to be earlier than this. And one of my lady friends says Lady friends, man, you can tell I'm old. Right? One of the ladies, said, babe, you're really shaking today. And I said, oh, am I? She said, yeah.

Bridget [00:16:05]:
I couldn't even hold my phone. I was trying to take a photo, And I couldn't hold my phone. But, you know, I guess I I didn't realize it because I I sh shook most of the time. And, she said, I'm even noticing your head shaking, which was concerning to me. And so they the 3 of them, There was 4 of us that were hanging out at the time. 3 of them had just kept picking, picking, picking. Call the doctor. Call the doctor.

Bridget [00:16:29]:
Call the doctor. You know? And, so I said, okay. I'll go call the doctor. So I called the doctor. He did an examination, as the same doctor I went to 7 years ago. And he said, oh, I see. It's a little bit worse than it was. They Parkinson's disease, there's no definitive test for it.

Bridget [00:16:54]:
They have to make a clinical they do these little, You know, tap your fingers together, touch your nose and all this stuff and they have you walk and all these kinds of things. And he did all that and then he said,

G-Rex [00:17:07]:
well,

Bridget [00:17:08]:
I'm gonna have you go for this test. And I said, well, what is the test? He said it's called a DAT scan. And, it's no big deal. It's an easy test. No big deal. You know, little Chinese guy who's just so sweet. No big deal. And he held my hands right before I left the office.

Bridget [00:17:28]:
He goes, this is going to help me rule out Parkinson's. He said, I don't think you have Parkinson's, but I just wanna rule it out. So well, okay. So then, you know, weeks later, I was trying to get it scheduled, and it was hard to get it scheduled. And I said, I'm not gonna do it. I mean, I know it's not Parkinson's. You know, it's a $750 test. Mine didn't meet my deductible yet.

Bridget [00:17:54]:
I'd have to pay for this. I'm gonna have this test and it's gonna say nothing. So and then ladies know you're gonna have the test. I'm, like, well, I just hate to spend that money and they come back. You know, I'm pretty sure it's not you know, no big deal. Bridget, have the test. Just put your mind at ease. Okay.

Bridget [00:18:19]:
We're gonna have the test. So I go ahead the test and and, it it's really not a big deal. They make you drink this Stuff that apparently lights up your brain in some, some kind of radioactive type Stuff. I don't even know. I mean, I sound really stupid. I haven't really educated myself on that. But, anyway, so So so I had the test, and then it was like weeks, a month before I could see my doctor again. And the ladies, You know, would you find out about your test results? I said, no.

Bridget [00:18:55]:
Not yet. I said, and I don't get to see the doctor until July. This was in May. I can't believe that. Can't you call the doctor and get in earlier? I said, no. You can't just get in to see a neurologist whenever you feel like it. I'm on you know, I've got an appointment, and, they just kept on and saying, well, there's gotta be a way you can find out what the results of that test were. And, I said, well, it was she said, where where was it? I said it was at Vanderbilt.

Bridget [00:19:22]:
Oh, yeah. You can get on their their patient portal there and Get anything there and you'll be able to get your results. I'm like, I don't wanna do that. I shouldn't do that. Right? I should wait to see the doc. No. Go, you know, do it. Do it.

Bridget [00:19:40]:
Yeah. Mhmm. Those people are naggy. But I love them. So so, of course, I log in to the patient portal And test results, you know, they short and sweet. The low something about the level of dopamine. There's a reduced level of dopamine that is indicative of Parkinson's disease. And it can be one of these other 2 things as well.

Bridget [00:20:22]:
So while it didn't confirm And since it confirmed was a tad of loss of the dopamine, which is what causes the Parkinson's in the 1st place. So I see this, and it's like 8, 9 o'clock at night. And then I see this online, and I'm like, oh my god. You know? So I send it to my friend who's a nurse. And, of course, she's on Google checking all these other diseases out. Yeah.

G-Rex [00:20:48]:
Because that's how we all cure ourselves.

Dirty Skittles [00:20:49]:
Yeah. Really?

Bridget [00:20:50]:
And I Which which I don't So I said, I I I was glad I didn't have the other 2. Well, I don't know. You know? I didn't know at the time. But Feel like I'm going all over the place. No. You're fine.

G-Rex [00:21:06]:
So I,

Bridget [00:21:10]:
So I had to sweat it out from the end of May until 5th, The 12th July Wow. Before I could get in to see the doctor. I did call his nurse To see if there was any way I could at least just talk to him before I went in because I found out this information. Because I was hoping if I could talk to him, he could talk me off the ledge because at that point, I didn't know what was going on. Yeah. And she and she said, well, your test did show that it's likely Parkinson's, and he wants to see you. He wants you to come in And talk to you about medications, but I can't get you in any sooner. So I sat on that till July 12th.

Bridget [00:22:00]:
And by that time, I'm thinking, I'm gonna go in there. He's gonna say, yeah. This test does this, But it's not Parkinson's. Let's you know, let's just see how it goes. But no. That didn't happen.

Dirty Skittles [00:22:16]:
That's the denial part of the, 5 c is angry.

Bridget [00:22:21]:
So I said, are you sure? And he said, Yeah. I'm pretty sure. So he put me on the medicine and, the medicine is supposed to, Stimulate the the dopamine in your brain. So I started taking that. I had another follow-up appointment with him just last month. And, of course, I'm getting ready to go in there and I'm thinking, I'm gonna ask him again. It's probably a mistake. So go on there and he asked me how I'm doing and I tell him.

Bridget [00:22:59]:
I said, okay. So tell me, what let's say you let's say you didn't have the DAT scan. What part of that little exam that you did with me Makes you think that I that I have that I really have Parkinson's. I said, what made you What made you think that? What made you even decide that I should go for the DAT scan? I said, because I'm not seeing some of the symptoms I'm reading about online. I don't have this. I don't have that. I don't have the other. Well, the thing about Parkinson's is they say if you If you see 1 Parkinson's patient, you've seen 1 Parkinson's patient because everybody is different, Which is why they're having trouble finding a cure.

Bridget [00:23:42]:
Right? But, anyway, back to him and he said, well, you have stiffness. You know? And he was Showing me something on my wrist. You know, I guess if you live live with certain things after a you just don't know you're doing you haven't. So there are things that that I was, exhibiting to him that he would would let him let him to think So I walk out of that office thinking, okay, alright, so let's work on this acceptance again. Well, Then I got mad. Yeah. So I stayed in the anger for a couple of weeks. Now I'm back, and it's a mistake.

Bridget [00:24:27]:
So

G-Rex [00:24:30]:
So can I just tell you what the 5 stages of grief are?

Bridget [00:24:33]:
Yes.

G-Rex [00:24:34]:
Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. So I think you have the first 4 down pat. That whole acceptance part, that that that's not coming.

Bridget [00:24:46]:
No. Not yet. And so, Vanderbilt here in Nashville has a center of excellence for Parkinson's. That's great. And they have all kinds of, programs special programs there, and they have These movement disorder specialists, they're neurologists with advanced training in movement disorders. I called them in May, after I got my test result. And The soonest I could get in to see the movement disorder specialist was May of 2024. Wow.

Bridget [00:25:20]:
So I made an appointment. So now the latest thing on my mind is I'm gonna go there in May. Yeah. And I'm gonna talk to a real specialist, and they're gonna say, This has been a mistake. You know, it's it's insanity.

Dirty Skittles [00:25:43]:
No. I mean, it's a it's a it's something like you said. You prepare for almost everything. This is something that you probably would have never prepared for. So now you're

Bridget [00:25:56]:
1000000 years.

Dirty Skittles [00:25:57]:
Yeah. You're You're bargaining. You're trying to, get there.

Bridget [00:26:04]:
You know

Dirty Skittles [00:26:04]:
what I mean?

Bridget [00:26:07]:
And and here's here's all the fears that I that I have. Okay. So I live alone. That's a biggie right there. I mean, I've met a lot of people, and most of the people that I meet have their care partners, husbands and wives. Right? I don't have that. Things could happen. They May might might not, but things could happen, which makes it I will not be able to take care of myself and live independently.

Bridget [00:26:38]:
Yeah. Those that's a really big fear for me. I have 1 child, a son. I would never expect to burden him with taking care of me. Yeah. And what do I do? You know? What's gonna end up how am I gonna but but, you know, we we we Go out into the future and think of all the what ifs, what ifs, what ifs. And, you know, I know I have to stay in today and accept what's Going on with me today. However, I feel like it's irresponsible for me not to think about and make contingency planning.

Bridget [00:27:11]:
Right?

G-Rex [00:27:11]:
Yeah.

Bridget [00:27:12]:
Because that's just the person I am. Right.

Dirty Skittles [00:27:14]:
I just

Bridget [00:27:14]:
wanna make sure if this happens, I'm gonna do this. If this happens, I'm gonna do that. And my mom has been in a nursing home for 2 years and that has been really a struggle for all of us because she has a Early stages of dementia. And a lot of times you'll talk to her, and there's nothing wrong with her. You don't think there's anything wrong with her. And, And I I pay her bills, so I know how much it's costing us every month. You know? It's $12,000 a month. For nursing.

Bridget [00:27:47]:
Wow. Yeah. So So then I look at my money, you know, the the retirement that I set aside for myself, which would make me, You know, not rich, but comfortable. Right? And Oh, god. Now if I have to go to a nursing home, how long is that gonna last? And then am I gonna go on Medicaid? And then I'm gonna be It's just this crazy cycle. So I know what I need to do. I need I need to do some things for myself. Right? Yeah.

Bridget [00:28:29]:
Gee, Rex, you're gonna tell me. What are you you're gonna ask me. What am I doing for self care? I'm not doing a damn thing.

G-Rex [00:28:36]:
Well, don't you do but don't you aren't you doing, like, water aerobics, like, a couple of times a week?

Bridget [00:28:41]:
Three times a week.

G-Rex [00:28:43]:
That's self care?

Bridget [00:28:45]:
Yes. And I stopped doing it. And here's here's okay. So I I think I'd mentioned this to you before. You know, I'm not a exerciser. I hate exercise. I don't like to sweat. I don't like to be out of breath.

Bridget [00:29:02]:
I mean, it's just inconvenient. So I like the water aerobics because while I still get a good aerobic workout, I don't Sweat. And if I do, who cares? I'm in the water. Mhmm. And so I look I don't look at that, like, exercise. But what has happened since like, I was doing it 3 times a week. Well, now that the pool is closed, the outside pool, we've moved it to inside. And we don't have a teacher.

Bridget [00:29:32]:
We have these tapes that we listen to, and we do this this routine. Well, The sound system that they have inside that pool it's horrible the the I have a thing with my hearing anyway, if there's a lot of, noise going on in backgrounds, and I I get real anxious. And that day that I was there, I couldn't hear I could hear the music On the, the CD or whatever it was, but I couldn't hear the guy talking and telling us what to do. Half of it I had memorized, so that was not a big deal. But it was the background noise that by the time I left that class, I was on the edge. I had more anxiety when I left there than I did when I got there. So I, I I can't do that. So It while it's gonna be inside, I'm not gonna be able to do it.

Bridget [00:30:31]:
So a couple days, what I did was I went down there in the afternoon, and I I've jobbed up and down the pool. I guess we're there for about a hour. I can do that. So I'm gonna have to kind of figure out a a new A new pad or new, schedule of doing that on my own. And we, Put in a all a brand new Gym at the clubhouse to put all new equipment in there tomorrow. I'm going up there. They're gonna show us how to use the machines And they were supposed to, get this piece of equipment that was supposedly good For Parkinson's patient. I don't know what it is, but I'm gonna go tomorrow and check that out.

Bridget [00:31:20]:
Let's go. So I'm gonna try that too. So I really have to work on the exercise because I've been told the exercise is, oftentimes even better than the medicine they give you. It's more effective. And the more exercise you do, the better the better. I mean, it doesn't make anything go away. It doesn't change the, What the disease does to you, it just makes you, More fit and more, you know I wanna say.

G-Rex [00:32:01]:
So can I tell you that they actually have, like, waterproof, like, for swimming earbuds?

Bridget [00:32:10]:
Well, where I can hear the person, but not the

G-Rex [00:32:14]:
Now you'd be able to hear everything. I I I'll send you some information on this. My brother's a big swimmer, so he has

Bridget [00:32:23]:
Yeah.

G-Rex [00:32:23]:
He has earbuds that he swims with, and he swims Lake Michigan. But I I think that there's a way that you'll be able to connect to the system so you can hear him in your ears. Everybody else will be able to hear it, but you'll be able to hear it also.

Bridget [00:32:38]:
In the earbuds. I don't if it's

G-Rex [00:32:40]:
a blue

Bridget [00:32:41]:
if it's Bluetooth, though. It has to be Bluetooth. Right?

G-Rex [00:32:44]:
Yeah. Probably. I'm gonna look into that because I think that the swimming is good for you

Bridget [00:32:51]:
because it clears

G-Rex [00:32:52]:
your because it clears your head.

Bridget [00:32:54]:
Yeah. I loved it. So I I'm gonna figure something out, because when I was doing, I did feel better.

Dirty Skittles [00:33:03]:
Yeah. I wonder if this is one of those things where you'll have to get I don't wanna say get through. Like, you compared it to the 5 stages of grief. And I don't know if it's something that you have to get through each stage or just Find your way in each stage before you can focus on something else.

Bridget [00:33:32]:
Yeah. Find peace, I guess. Find peace in each stage I'm in and acceptance of it. I yeah. I'm in this stage, and it's okay for me to be in this stage instead of fighting it.

Dirty Skittles [00:33:57]:
It's okay to be not okay. Just make sure you're talking to someone.